To become a padawan
by fluffykitty12
Summary: Six months after being rescued from Geonoshia, Shadow skywalker finds herself wishing she could become a padawan to ensure she protects those she loves during the clone wars. Suddenly, a nightly wander across the temple becomes incredibly complicated when she receives a vision saying she can become a padawan at a great price. She excepts, but can she survive, or is life the cost?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Shadow looked around the deserted halls of the temple. Just because it was night, didn't mean that everyone had to sleep. She had known that since she was a little girl.

Ashoka and Anakin were gone, away on a mission, and Obi-wan was busy on council business. It was boring alone. It had been six months since she had been found on Geonoshia, and she had seen very little of Anakin and ashoka. She longed for her brother and friend.

She hoped she would find Jacob Yangris, her best friend, wandering the halls somewhere tonight. Besides, ever since she had gotten back, her sleep was haunted with nightmares, not just the usual ones, of all the horrible ways her mother had died, but ones about slavery and Anakin and Ashoka. With new friends came terrible new worries.

She silently wished she could a padawan, so she could make sure she could protect those she loved when she was in a battle. She felt strange. She knew visions were coming. They always did when she felt like this, but she hadn't told anyone. It wasn't a physical illness, but a mental flutter. And suddenly, she was gone.

She looked up into the face of a strange man. She had never seen him before, but she sensed his force signature. It seemed as though she had sensed him in her other visions, too.

"Lonely, I can tell you are." He said.

She stood and nodded from where she had been sitting cross-legged on the floor.

"I wish I were a padawan." She said quietly.

The man winced. "If you are to become one, it will cost you a great price." He said.

She shook her head. "I don't care. I will pay any price to be a padawan and protect those I love."

The man's eyes held a deep sadness within them.

"Do you really wish to pay this price?" he asked quietly.

She nodded. "With all my heart."

"YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND!" the man yelled.

She was shocked by this outburst.

The man sighed. He had a strong, steady build, long hair, and brown eyes that met her blue ones strikingly. "I am sorry, but the price, I fear, is to great for someone so young as you."

"So you won't help me?" Shadow said, dismayed.

"I will help you if I can, young one.' He said quietly.

"but if only you knew." He sighed. The image was fading. Everything was receding.

She awoke in some strange branch of the temple, laying on the floor. She felt cold. She didn't understand how she had gotten here.

Suddenly, she gasped. She was near the quarters of the Jedi masters, where they lived and meditated.

Whatever would befall her if she was found here at this late hour, she knew it wasn't good. What had happened to just a simple night talking to Jacob?

She got to her feet. She started walking. She was near the end of the hall, where Master Windu's quarters were. She needed to leave, though. Before she could reach the other end of the hall, she bumped into something. An orange shield materialized before her, and she stared in shock and horror.

That wasn't supposed to be there.

She sensed darkness suddenly, and it scared her so much that it took her breath away. She had sensed this man before. Anakin had told her about him. She knew him by name. Dooku.

Chapter 2

Mace windu had been retiring to his quarters, which had a balcony overlooking the busy city of Courasant. It had been a particularly grueling day for the Jedi. He had had to attend a senate meeting- he hated the long, droning redundancy of the senate, though he'd never admit it.

The senate had demanded more results, while the Jedi and clones were doing their best. They never gave the senate less. And what did they receive? Harassment. People laughing, saying the Jedi were the servants of the senate.

Mace didn't even bother changing his tunic. He crawled under the covers and closed his eyes, exhausted.

He was so exhausted, he didn't hear the click of the lock on his balcony door opening. Count Dooku stepped inside, his eyes gleaming evilly in the darkness.

He removed the shield generators from his belt and soundlessly installed them around the place where Windu laid. He activated the shield with a hum.

Windu sat up in bed, staring.

Dooku." He said, narrowing his eyes angrily at the separatist.

Dooku laughed and smiled.

"It appears I have a rather valuable hostage with me this night." He said, grinning.

"You'll never get away with this." Windu said.

Dooku laughed. "Oh, I already have. Your quarter is completely isolated and shield off. No one can help you now. They will meet my demands, or you will die."

Even Windu was surprised when Dooku easily access the Jedi PA system and spoke, loud and deep, across the temple.

"Welcome, Jedi." He said quietly.

"Count Dooku has decided to pay a visit. I would not advise anyone try to stop me, as Master Windu is my hostage. Besides, you cannot get around my shields."

The temple was instantly on red alert. The younglings awoke, terrified at what they were hearing. Everyone awoke, in fact, and Jedi rushed to protect younglings. They were herded all inside the great hall. All except one.

Obi-wan Kenobi kept track of who was accounted for.

He turned to the supervisor of the girls dormitories.

"I have one unaccounted for on record.' He said

The supervisor nodded. "The only one we don't have… is Shadow Skywalker.'

Kenobi felt his heart beat a little faster as heard the name of his future padawan being reported as missing. He instantly felt fear ripple through him, almost like a physical pain. His stomach started to churn.

He was about to ask about a search party when the meeting began. Yoda spoke.

"A grave day for the temple, this is.' He said.

"Captured one of our own on temple grounds, Dooku has.' Yoda said.

"Rescue him, we cannot, since a hostage, he is." Yoda said.

"Hope, we must, that the force is with us." He said.

The room was silent, and each and every Jedi reached out, feeling every single presence. They felt Mace Windu, Count Dooku- and someone else.

The great hall instantly broke into murmurs of confusion.

Whoever they sensed, it was someone from the light side besides master windu. People were making wild guesses. But Obi-wan stood silently. He looked up at master yoda.

"I'd know her anywhere.' He said quietly. And, using the force, he could tell Yoda heard him. "It's shadow."

"Quiet!" Jedi master Ki-Adi-Mundi ordered and finally, the chatter died down.

Obi-wan was already activating his comm link.

Chapter 3

Shadow looked up, alarmed, when he comlink signaled.

Quickly, she answered it.

"Shadow this is Obi-wan.' Obi-wan started.

"Obi-wan!" shadow whispered. She nearly collapsed with relief.

"Listen, Obi-=wan, I've gotten myself into a… situation."

Obi-wan waited. Shadow sighed. 'I'm on the other side of the force field, by Master Windu's quarters." She finished.

Obi-wan looked surprised.

'do you have a light saber?" he asked.

"Only a training light saber.' She said.

Obi-wan hurriedly spoke to master Yoda and Master Mundi, and they quickly retreated to another, more private room.

"Shadow heard them murmuring for a moment, then Obi-wan spoke again.

"Does the count know where you are currently?" he asked.

Just then, shadow heard a cry of pain. She turned off her comm and started to run.

The door to Master Windu's quarters was open and she was inside before she could stop herself. She had felt the pain he was feeling through the force, and, like the impulsive person she was, ran inside.

She found Mace tied, stun cuffs on his wrist, force collar around his neck, facing a droid with a stun baton.

She ignited her light saber in a motion too fast to see and charged forward.

Dooku sensed her and whirled, igniting his light saber just in time to meet hers. The surprise was evident on his face, but then his lips peeled back into an evil sneer.

"So good to see you again, Shadow. I've been meaning to finish off your brother now for sometimes, but this should give him the message.'

He swung his light saber in an offensive strike, and she just barely dodge and came in from the back.

Dooku blocked and tried to stab her, but she blocked this and ducked, rolling to the side, now on a full defensive.

She breathed in slowly and felt the force fill her. Suddenly, she knew she was going to fight like she had only fought a few times before. She whirled, attacking and throwing Dooku off balance. With a swift kick to the stomach, she felt her light saber graze his shoulder.

Dooku jumped back, looking alarmed. He laughed.

"a training light saber? A _training _light saber? You see how the Jedi hold you back?"

Shadow shook her head, realizing a training light saber would never win her the battle.

Just then, she saw Mace Windu grab his light saber from the droid with the stun baton. It lunged forward and shocked the Jedi, and master Windu threw the light saber towards her. She reached up a hand and caught it, igniting it swiftly and holding it in front of her.

It felt different. She liked the feel of Anakin's light saber better, how the hilt seemed to fit into the grooves of her hand perfectly, but this would have to do.

She met Dooku's offensive blow and leaned over the light saber blades, as though mocking him.

"Shadow!" mace said.

Shadow knew this was a risk, but she longed to do it. She gathered a mouth full of salvia and spit on Dooku's face.

Dooku recoiled and she managed a slight cut on his hit.

The rage clearly blossomed in Dooku's eyes, and he lunged forward, into a volley of attacks so fierce it was all shadow could do to defend.

She lost her balance as she pivoted to avoid a slash and fell.

Dooku grinned and lifted his light saber for the final strike.

Shadow inhaled the force in a silent, desperate breath, and sent the sith lord flying across the room.

Shadow got to her feet and force jumped after him, launching another series of attacks.

Dooku left and opening and she saw her, chance, stepping in and having a slice come in from an unexpected angle. She barely dodged in time, and felt half of her ponytail fall to the floor.

She was sweating now, and Dook force pushed her away and jumped forward, trying to stab her. She blocked in midair and fell.

Dooku again tried to kill her, but she rolled to the side and struck out.

She felt his blade swipe across her cheek and wanted to scream.

But instead she used the force to send master Windu's bed flying toward Dooku, who had to quickly evade, and she got to her feet, breathing heavily.

She turned and faced Dooku, felt his burning hatred come down on her, realized the obvious skill of this man, and how much he wanted to destroy her. And for one the few times in her life since she had become a Jedi, she was afraid.

Chapter 4

Anakin nearly jumped to his feet. He started pacing suddenly.

"Master, what is it?" Ashoka asked, clearly startled. "Something's happened to Shadow.' Anakin said. He had grown pale, Ashoka realized.

"Ashoka, take off for me.' He said. They had just finished their mission, to deliver medical supplies to a republic outpost, and were about to return to Courasant.

Anakin got on his com and called obi-wan.

"I sense something's happening." He said to obi-wan. 'It has to do with Shadow. What is it?"

Obi-wan sighed. With Anakin's grip on the force, it was hard to hide things from him.

"Dooku's broken into the temple." He said quietly.

Anakin was silent. He was afraid of what he would hear next.

"He's kidnapped master windu. He put up shields around his quarters and is holding him hostage. We've recently had contact with shadow. She's the only Jedi beyond the force field, and we just lost contact with her a few minutes ago.'

Anakin let out a deep breath.

Ashoka powered up the ship, as if not believing what she had heard.

Anakin leaned against the wall, his hand on his forehead for a moment. Finally, he spoke. "Do what you can, obi-wan.'; he said. 'And tell Dooku I'll see him soon."

Obi-wan sighed, and the transmission cut out.

Chapter 5

"Remember your basics, shadow!" mace Windu encouraged his. The droid shocked him suddenly.

He started talking to her through her find. _Foot work. Remember no keep going forward, no matter what._

Shadow dodged a bow and flipped over Dooku, and he pivoted to meet her blade, before it severed him in half.

"You will not live, youngling.' Dooku growled.

Shadow was silent as she fought him. She was too tired to speak. Sweat poured down her and Dooku's face, and well as blood from the numerous times Dooku had shoved her up against the wall with the force.

She fought on, wondering about the price she had had to pay, the vision she had had earlier.

She was distracted for a split second, and she jumped backwards before Dooku could cut off her legs.

_Help me old man… _she thought silently. _You said you would…_

The point of collapse was soon upon her, after what had seemed like hours of fighting. She knew Dooku was tired, too, though. It was just the matter of who made the fatal mistake first.

Shadow flipped backwards, and she ducked his blade, slicing towards his legs. Her saber tore into his calf, and he screamed and jumped back.

She got to her feet and blocked a strike, finding the perfect opening and lunging inwards.

It was that that split second Dooku turned and cut off her arm.

She screamed as she felt the burning saber piercing her skin, slicing completely through her left arm and hearing it hit the floor.

She couldn't run back to block, only allow her momentum to carry her forward, away from what she knew if she turned would be a fatal strike.

She dodged it just in time, hitting the floor and using her one arm to scramble back to her feet. She circle Dooku, gasping for breath, holding the light saber in her hand. She was fighting back tears now, but she swallowed them all and continued to fight.

She was defensive now; with only one arm, she was off balance and hardly able to gather the courage to charge forwards again.

She found he had cornered her in one move. She knew she couldn't flip over him or dodge. She wouldn't land. She wasn't going to last much longer.

She tried desperately to dodge, but she felt the tip of Dooku's light saber enter her abdomen, below her rib. The hot pain was enough to make her scream.

She fell to her knees, Windu's light saber escaping her gasp and extinguishing on the floor.

She was trying to hold back the tears as she was facing her death, she knew.

The evil grin split Dooku's lips again.

"Any last words, youngling?" he asked hatefully.

She gasped a breath and spoke. "Go on and kill me. I'll be dead, but I'll be the force. I'll see my mother, Qui-gon, all those you vile sith have taken from me!" Tears were streaming down her face, now. "And I'll be part of the force, giving the Jedi strength to kill _scum _like you!" she laid her head down, still gasping for breath.

Dooku looked unnerved at her outburst.

He hesitated.

_I'll see you soon, old man. _She thought, figuring she'd see the dead Jedi from her vision.

Dooku hesitated for a moment that was all it took. She felt the force gathering around her, like a presence, almost.

She sprang to her feet, calling the light saber to her hand with the force, igniting it and flipping behind Dooku, landing and slashing off Dooku's leg cleanly across the knee.

Dooku screamed and hs leg fell off beneath him.

Shadow lunged forward to finish him, but he still fought, one legged as he was. She flew at him with a series of advanced combinations she's never learned, and pushed him back.

"Your hatred makes you weak.' She said quietly.

"Your weakness is your downfall. And your downfall is my victory.'

She slashed forward. Dooku desperately shot force lightening from his finger tips. She blocked it with her light saber, brandishing the weapon as she slowly approached the count.

Just then, the droid with the stun button appeared behind her. She whirled to attack, and Dooku started towards the balcony, limping furiously.

He hit a button on his wrist and jumped into his speeder just as Shadow slid under the droid and dispatched it,.

She stood quietly and staggered over to Windu.

She gently removed his force-restraint collar, and sliced through his bindings.

Her breath rattled now; her vision began to blur.

She fell to her knees.

Shadow!" Windu caught her and held her in his arms as she gasped and passed out, going limp.

Windu looked down at her small form and scrambled to her feet.

He contacted Obi-wan on his comlink.

"Shadow did it.' He said,.

"We need healers up here, and someone to get rid of the shield."

"We'll sent them up." Obi-wan assured him.

Mace windu carried the small girl with him to where the force field glowed orange. He easily took out the generators with his light saber and was met by a barge of healers on the other side, as well as Kenobi.

Windu very gently placed her on the repulsor lift stretcher, and he saw the pained look on Obi-wan face as he saw the girl without her arm and the gaping hole in her midsection.

He quietly walked beside the stretcher with mace, explaining the situation.

"I can describe it for the records, if need be." Mace said.

Obi-wan nodded. "Did temple security get it taped?" mace shrugged. 'I honestly don't know, Kenobi. I'll check.

He reluctantly strode away from them, back toward his quarters.

He was afraid for the youngling he had seen sacrifice so much for him. No. She shouldn't be a youngling. She had just turned eleven, after all. She was old enough to be a padawan. She _deserved _to be a padawan. Anyone that age who could survive Dooku disserved to be a padawan.

Mace windu quickly found the security cam in the wall and opened it up.

The rooms of council members were under constant surveillance, after all ,to show assignation attempts and other events, such as intrusions.

Mace grabbed the tape and hurried to the council room, where the council was quickly assembling.

Mace had a holo-projector brought in and wordlessly showed the duel, every detail of it, on the projector.

Master mundi was the first to speak. "Will the girl live?" he asked.

"That is unknown." Mace said quietly.

Just then, obi-wan entered, his face showing incredible relief.

"She'll live.' He announced. "They're just taking her into surgery now."

Mace windu nodded.

"sit down, obi-wan.

He showed the tape again, watched every feature of Shadow's face as she fought.

Finally, the video was over. Obi-wan was silent, and he waited.

"the reason I have showed you all this is that I believe Shadow skywalker is ready to become a padawan."

The council began to murmur.

"Emotions are clouding your judgment! One man said.

"Did you not see her skill?" Mundi retorted.

Finally, mace quieted everyone.

"Obi-wan, what do you think?" he asked.

Obi-wan shook his head. "I am to be her master, after all, Master Windu. It would not be balanced for me to comment."

"What would you say if you could vote?" Mace asked.

Obi-wan sighed. "I would say she's been ready for some time now." He said.

The council began to murmur again.

Finally, it was put to a vote.

She was to become a padawan.

Obi-wan nodded and walked down to the medical bay with Master windu.

Anakin and Ashoka were just arriving from the hangar when Obi-wan finished the braid. He gently tied it and watched her as she lay asleep, unconscious under the sedative of surgery.

Anakin rushed in a moment later, ashoka beside him.

"master." Anakin said, looking nervously over at obi-wan.

Obi-wan stepped away from the bed and allowed Anakin to see her.

Anakin stepped forward silently and knelt by the bed.

Shadow's mechanical al lay beside her on the bed, motionless.

Her stab wound had been bandaged carefully.

Anakin gingerly touched her metal arm, then pulled away.

He quietly placed his head it his hands for a moment.

Then, he noticed her braid. Very gently, he picked it up and held it between his fingers.

He gently sat down beside her other singed hair again.

"How did it happen?" he asked quietly.

"Dooku cut it off.' Obi-wan explained. "She fought valiantly, Anakin. She saved Master Windu, after all.'

Anakin nodded.

Mace looked over at Anakin, a bit guilty.

"I can show you the recording, Skywalker.: he offered.

Anakin shook his head.

"later.' He said.

"I have to be with her now.

Mace nodded and quietly left the room with one last glance down at the girl who had saved his life.

Ashoka sat beside her master, and Obi-wan joined them a minute later, all watching her sleep.

She stirred, and her eyes opened a minute later.

She gently used her mechanical arm to try to sit up, and she cried out in pain and fell.

Gently, Anakin took her hand.

"can you feel it?" he asked quietly.

She nodded.

"What happened?" she asked quietly.

"Dooku cut off your arm and stabbed you." Anakin said.

Shadow nodded, taking it all very well.

"Did I do anything note worthy?" she asked quietly.

"You cut off his leg." Ashoka interjected.

Shadow brightened at this.

"Anything else?" she asked quietly.

"Nope." Anakin said. "Not really." He grinned at Obi-wan.

Obi-wan got the hint.

"So how do you feel, padawan?" he asked.

Shadow shrugged. "oh, not bad and-" she realized what he had said and felt her padawan braid trailing down beside her.

"No…" she said in disbelief. Anakin grinned.

"hello, Padawan skywalker.' He said.

She grinned at him, the nodded, as though being serious.

"he was right." She said quietly. "It came at a great cost."

Anakin stared at her, a bit unnerved.

He exchanged a glance with Obi-wan.

"What came at great cost?" he asked quietly.

"the old man told me so.' She said.

"I had a vision as I was walking around the temple, trying to find Jacob. He asked if I truly wanted to be a padawan to protect those I loved. I said yes, and he told me…" Shadow trailed off.

Anakin was looking at her like she was insane now.

"You're tired." He assured her gently, pulling the covers up to her chin.

"Rest now. You're pretty beat up."

Shadow sighed in exasperation, knowing Anakin didn't believe her, but she quickly turned it into a sigh of exhaustion as Anakin watched her silently.

She squirmed, trying to act as though she were going to get comfortable, and cried out in pain. She had forgotten Dooku had stabbed her.

Anakin shot her one last look before turning silently and staring at obi-wan, concern written all over his face.

The two stood and exited the room quietly.

Ashoka remained behind, trying to be sure her friend was alright.  
Shadow sensed them go and opened one eye.

"You believe me, don't you?" she asked quietly.

"yes." Ashoka said, nodding her head. "tell me the rest of it."

Shadow sighed. "This man, I could tell he was a Jedi- he told me that in order to become a padawan immediately, to protect those I loved, I'd have to pay a great price. I told him whatever it was, I'd pay it. He got mad, saying I didn't know the cost. Then he apologized, and said he'd help me. Then he was gone."

Ashoka looked down at her friend in shock.

'So, what was the price?" she asked quietly.

Shadow lifted her metal arm from the bed and flexed her fingers.

She sighed. "My arm, I guess." She said.

Ashoka nodded. "Don't worry, I believe you. I really do."

Shadow gave her an exhausted smile. 'I knew you would, Ashoka. You're my best friend…."

Ashoka was touched. Her friend rarely spoke like that to her, acknowledging her friendship and praising her. But she needed Ashoka most now, too. Ashoka felt when she left on missions, she had abandoned her friend.

Anakin strode back into the room, took one look at Shadow, and decided.

"Sorry girls, but no more talking. You rest now, Shadow."

Shadow nodded and gently closed her eyes, falling asleep once again, under the influence of the painkillers they had given her.

Anakin sighed, exasperated, and sat down beside her. He studied her metal arm, which lay outside the bedcovers.

"Dooku will pay for this." He murmured quietly. "She's just a child, for force's sake. And he cut off her arm."

"Shadow cut off his leg." Ashoka said.

"That was different!" Anakin insisted. "he was trying to kill her!" Ashoka nodded. 'I know, master."

"And now she's going to be shipped out into the clone wars…" Anakin paled.

"She's ready, master." Ashoka said quietly.

Anakin shook his head. "I hope your right." He said quietly.

Shadow awoke screaming. She sat bolt upright in bed and felt her stab wound burn, and she cried out in pain and doubled over.

Anakin gently stroked her hair, struggling to calm her. But she was sobbing now, sobbing so hard Anakin couldn't stop her.

"What's wrong, Shadow?" he asked anxiously. "Tell me where it hurts."

She just kept crying. Finally, she looked up at ashoka. "It was the Jedi." She said quietly. "He's the only reason I'm alive. He possessed me, helped me, just like he said he would. And not supposed to be a padawan right now."

Shadow started to cry harder.

Anakin shot Ashoka a nervous glance.

He turned back to Shadow, trying to calm her, swearing he'd sort it all out.

When she was calmly back asleep, he motioned for Ashoka to come into the hall with him.

"What did she tell you before?" Anakin asked, eyes serious.

Ashoka shook her head. "You didn't listen. You'll think she's crazy."

"Ashoka!" Anakin grabbed her arm and stared at her angrily. Ashoka gasped as she felt his grip on her arm tighten painfully.

Anakin looked down at his clenched hand and pulled away, horrified at what he'd done.

"I'm sorry, ashoka. I'm so sorry." He slid down the wall and sat, and Ashoka joined him after a moment.

"You didn't mean it, master." She assured him quietly.

Anakin shook his head. "I don't understand why she's so scared. I've never seen her like this."

Ashoka sighed, and the entire story poured out.

When she was done, Anakin nodded. "I'll have to tell the council about this, Ashoka.' She said quietly.

Ashoka looked horrified. "And ask them to make her a youngling again?" she asked.

Anakin sighed. 'They'll do what they think best." He said quietly.

"And what about you!?" Ashoka cried, standing up. "You're her brother!"

"It's out of my hands, ashoka." Anakin sighed, standing up too.

"Whose in charge of her Anakin, the council or you!?"

"I don't know." Anakin admitted. He studied the ground. Just then, master Windu stopped beside them. Anakin sensed he knew nothing of his and Ashoka's conversation.

"Is shadow alright?" Mace Windu asked quietly.

Anakin shook his head. "Master windu, we need to talk her said quietly.

Slowly, he started walking down the hall, leaving Ashoka staring after him, more upset with him than she had ever been before.

Chapter 6

The jedi master listened calmly to everything Anakin had told him.

He nodded. "This situation is odd." He said quietly. "I'll take it up with the council right away."

Anakin nodded and thanked the Jedi master, then hurried back to Shadow.

Obi-wan was surprised and horrified when the council brought up the question of revoking Shadow's padawanship.

"We have been told she had a vision of an older, dead Jedi, telling her he would help her and that her padawanship would come at a great cost. She says in the end, when she should have died, he helped her to win."

The council began to murmur at this.

"Who did you hear this from?" he asked quietly.

"Anakin." Mace said.

Obi-wan felt the horror and anger build up within him.

Shadow had lost an arm, almost her life, to become a padawan. And now he wanted to take it all away.

Finally, Yoda spoke. "Never revoked a padawanship, have we." He said quietly. "Only expulsion from the order. We shall not start now."

The other Jedi masters nodded in agreement.

Mace contacted Anakin.

"She will remain a padawan." He told Anakin. "Despite the recent turn of events."

Anakin looked dismayed. "I see. Thank you." He said. He ended the transmission.

Ashoka leaned against the doorway, he face the picture of the anger and indignation she felt.

"Are you _trying _to keep her a youngling?" she demanded. "I can't believe you, sky guy."

"It's for her own good!" Anakin insisted. "She's not ready."

"No, _you're _not ready!" Ashoka said.

"Ashoka!" Anakin scolded, but his padawan kept going. "It's the will of the force she's a padawan now! You just don't want her fighting in the clone wars! This isn't about her! It's about your overprotectiveness!"

"Ashoka, go to your quarters." Anakin said firmly.

"No." Ashoka said.

"No!?: Anakin said. 'that is a direct order, Ashoka.'

"I just might stop taking orders from you." Ashoka replied.

Anakin looked like he was about to say something more when he heard a sob from the back of the room.

Shadow stood, tears streaming down her face, staring at you.

I did this for you." She said quietly. "I didn't want you to be alone. You're too- impulsive. You do stupid things. I did it for _you, _Anakin, so I could protect you." She cried quietly.

"Go and get yourself killed. I don't care." Shadow ran past him and out of the room.

Anakin turned to Ashoka. "You see what you did?" he asked, exasperated.

Ashoka shook her head, disgusted. "You did this." She turned and walked away, leaving Anakin alone with his thoughts.

Shadow ran to the place where she knew she'd be alone- the lake. The cool, green lake, with it's beautiful waterfall and calming colors. It was night, as the lights inside simulated, and she ran through the dark, staggering and falling, feeling her stab wound stretch and crying out.

She cried out, her eyes still streaming tears.

Finally, she dragged herself to the lake, crying, sobbing into the water.

She looked at her reflection; saw the metal glint from her arm. "I did this for _you!"_ She screamed. She cried harder.

She heard someone approaching behind her.

"_Go away!" _she screamed, thinking it was Anakin. "What do you want now!? To make sure I don't drown? Install a tracking device in my body? Lock me in a padded room for the rest of my life!?" She continued to cry.

"I thought I would find you here." Obi-wan said quietly. He placed a hand on her shoulder. "He doesn't want me to be a padawan!" Shadow cried, leaning against his chest and crying.

Obi-wan thought of how different she was from Anakin. She was fragile, almost easy to break if Anakin didn't approve. He had too much power over her, Obi-wan realized.

Shadow ahd cried herself out by now, and lay docile in Obi-wans arms.

"Are you going to say something comforting?" Shadow asked. "Or let me think I'm nothing?"

"You will be an excellent padawan, I promise you." Obi-wan said. He stroke her hair, and she leaned into him, in pain and exhausted. He carried her back to the med-wing.

He found Anakin waiting. He shot him a look as he laid a sleeping Shadow on her ed.

He shot Anakin a look. "How could you!?" he asked.

Anakin stood. "I don't think she's ready! Why can't anyone see my side of this!?" Anakin demanded.

"I didn't think you were ready, Anakin. Not emotionally. But I didn't crush you by saying so!" Obi-wan said.

Anakin was stunned. "You… you didn't?" Anakin asked.

Obi-wan shook his head. "No. And she was sobbing, Anakin- _sobbing_ by the lake, saying she did it all for you. She only wants to be with you to protect you, Anakin. She lost an _arm _and was stabbed for you."

Anakin shook his head. "She was possessed by the older Jedi."

Obi-wan shook his head. "Not until the end." He said.

He gave his companion a glare that made him look up.

"Well, I didn't want her to, Obi-wan!" Anakin cried out. "I would do anything for her to be normal right now!"

Obi-wan shook his head. "So you won't change your opinion?" he asked.

Anakin shook his head. 'No."  
he said quietly.

They each sat beside shadow in icy silence the night.


	2. Chapter 2

Shadow strode along the cool green lake beside Obi-wan, feeling the relief of actually moving again, and speaking to someone who was one of the few who knew her best.

It was a clear day by the lake, as it always was by the simulation of a beautiful outdoors place in the temple. Younglings played in the lake, swimming and splashing one another. Shadow longed to join them, but knew that even with a healing stab wound; she never would be allowed to. Besides, she was a padawan, she reminded herself, touching her padawan braid and watching her hair turn from a dirty blond color like Anakin's to the golden she knew it did in the sunlight.

"Shadow?" Obi-wan asked, a bit concerned. "Shadow? Are you alright?"

Shadow quickly snapped out of her trance and nodded. "yeah, I'm fine. Just enjoying being out of the med wing. Has Anakin come around yet?" Obi-wan shook his head sadly, just as disturbed as Shadow was that his former padawan didn't think she was ready to become a padawan.

Shadow had remembered the night. Hearing Ashoka, her best friend, and now, what seemed like her protector, from Anakin. Anakin had fought with her, saying he didn't think she was ready and was trying to protect her. He had thought she was asleep, and she had ended up running out sobbing, falling down by the lake, and crying into the water until Obi-wan had found her. Ever since that awful night, She had been icy towards Anakin, silent, almost now, for the past few days.

She was healing nicely, the medics had assured her, but she couldn't shake the feeling of the metallic arm on her.

It had been adjusted so she didn't feel the heavy pull on her nerves, and could feel pain through a complex circuitry traveling back to her spinal cord, as well as sensors that mimicked the nerve impulses and let her feel pain.

But whenever she hit her arm, she felt the pain, as though it were normal, but the metallic, droid-like clank it made always made her recoil in horror.

Anakin had ordered a cosmetic synthi-flesh sleeve be made for her, but she refused to wear it, deciding to rather brandish her metallic arm, droid-like as it looked, as Anakin did.

Obi-wan studied her as she flexed her fingers for a moment and continued to walk along.

"How's the arm?" he asked quietly.

Shadow shrugged. "I don't know. But the younglings have given me some strange looks lately. But it all feels- unreal. The pain it registers is somewhat normal, but less intense- like I'm… removed…."

Obi-wan nodded. "Anakin said the same when he first got his new arm."

At the mention of her brother's name, Shadow fell silent.

"You could wear the cosmetic sleeve, you know.' Obi-wan hurried to change the subject.

Shadow sighed. "Yeah, I know. But you know I've never been one for fancy things, master. I just want to get out on a mission and prove myself."

Obi-wan raised an eyebrow. "You need to prove nothing, padawan, and you have already shown the council you are ready." He said, eyeing her metallic arm.

Shadow sighed. "Yes, I suppose your right." She said. But really, she knew she needed to prove herself still. To the one being it mattered most to. Anakin.

Anakin sat in the room of a thousand fountains, trying to meditate. It had been two days since his fight with Ashoka and Shadow, and neither girl had said more than two words to him since. He knew he was being protective, yes, but also, he honestly didn't think she was ready.

_Or are you lying to yourself? _He wondered. He felt the frustration rise in him and sighed, leaving to go and practice in the gym.

It took three more days. Three boring, annoying days in the med wing bogged down with painkillers until they finally removed the bandages and pronounced her fit for duty. Even with her force-healing, it had taken long. Too long for her liking.

Shadow strode out of the med wing beside Obi-wan, happy it was finally over.

"Do we have a mission yet?" she asked, eager to prove herself to Anakin.

Obi-wan shook his head. "No, nothing yet." He said. He watched as shadow fell silent beside him. "But the council has called us."

Her face lit up, and Obi-wan grinned down at her, too.

They entered the turbo lift to the council chamber, Shadow barely being able to stand still.

They entered the chamber at precisely the right time, and stood before the council, nodding respectfully to Mace and the other Jedi masters.

A few moments later, Anakin and Ashoka strode in, as usual, late.

Obi-wan felt the waves of disapproval from his comrade as he noted Shadow was beside him.

Shadow sensed it, too, and stiffened.

Obi-wan quickly shot her a look and she relaxed.

"Good of you to show up, skywalker." Mace Windu commented skeptically.

Anakin nodded and flashed a small smile, only further irking the Jedi master off.

Shadow had to struggle to hide her own grin, but she wouldn't allow her lips to betray her with Anakin acting as he was.

Mace Windu cleared his throat and began.

"The planet Abridon, as you all know, is a major manufacturer of ships for the republic. Recently, we have received news from our intelligence believing sith have been spotted on the planet, along with several droid pods. We need you, if possible, to rid the planet of the sith and set up a precautionary base of clones there. You will receive further briefing on transport. May the force be with you."

They all wordlessly bowed and exited the chamber.

As soon as they were in the waiting room for the council, Anakin strode over to Obi-wan. "Why didn't you object them letting her on the mission!?" he demanded.

"Why didn't you?" Obi-wan retorted.

"Because I'm not her master!" Anakin said.

"Well I think she's ready." Obi-wan said quietly.

Shadow turned from where she had been talking with ashoka to shoot him an icy look. Anakin wanted to shudder, but instead he turned back to obi-wan.

"And why isn't she wearing the synthi-flesh cover for her arm?" he asked quietly.

"You know I designed one to fit her."

Obi-wan sighed. "I believe it is a matter of personal choice, Anakin. She didn't want to wear it."

"It doesn't matter!" Anakin said quietly, clearly upset.

"I don't want them looking at her like some… like some droid!" Anakin was clearly disturbed by the idea of Shadow walking around with her metal arm visible.

"So she's a freak, now, is she?" Obi-wan said, eyeing Anakin's mechanical arm, which was exposed, too, and showed the metal clearly.

"I can handle it. I've dealt with it for years! But she's just a child, for force's sake! Obi-wan, please, don't let her go like this!" Anakin was almost pleading, but Obi-wan knew it would help his friend let go.

He shook his head. "I didn't force you to wear the sleeve when you where my padawan." He said quietly. "I won't force her."

"I was nineteen, Obi-wan! Almost twenty! I could make that decision for myself!"

"So can she." Obi-wan said.

They had reached the hanger by now, and Shadow and Ashoka were already boarding the transport.

The padawans met in the briefing room, studying the small bit of informational holofiles they had been given, while Anakin and obi-wan piloted the ship.

Anakin piloted in an icy silence with obi-wan up to where a small cruiser awaited there landing. There were the clone forces aboard, and a small team of star fighters. Anakin nodded as he surveyed each ship, quietly nodding his approval.

Ashoka, Obi-wan, and shadow looked around, while Anakin finished surveying the ships. Anakin felt a pang when he realized Shadow wasn't beside him. She had tagged along as long as he had known her, giving each ship a once over and talking mechanics with him.

He started towards them, then noted Shadow's arm.

It hung beside her as normal, but her one fist was clenched. He started towards her, the worry evident on his face. "Shadow, come here for a minute." He ordered.

Shadow hurriedly shook her head. "No." she said, and she had paled a bit.

Anakin sighed. "Unclench your fist." he ordered.

Shadow shook her head. "No." she said.

"You can't, can you?" Anakin asked, waiting impatiently.

"I can too!" shadow said, almost whispering now. Clone captain rex was watching her now, eyeing his longtime friend carefully.

Just then, her mechanical fist opened and closed spastically, a spark shooting from the wrist.

"Shadow! Come here!" Anakin ordered.

Shadow shook her head hurriedly. "I'm fine." She said quietly.

Anakin shook his head. "Let me fix it." He said quietly. He took a step towards her, and she bolted.

Anakin quickly followed her, not making a sound.

Her arm hung limply beside her now, and Anakin knew it was no doubt dragging her down with the weight of it, which was no longer supporting itself, since it had powered down.

He still followed her, watching her as she ran down the deserted hallway.

He sighed. Why was she being so ridiculous?

Shadow hurriedly turned a corner before he had and he turned, a moment later, to find the hallway empty. It had been a dead-end, too.

He sent out waves of the force, sensing everything around him. He sensed her to his right and whirled. There was nothing there. He noticed a small nook where a maintenance cart was helped, and had surveyed it. She wasn't there, either.

He tried to sense upwards. He could tell she was still round somewhere. Probably in the vents.

"Alright." He called up a grate. "You won, okay? I'll see you later. Hope your arm doesn't self-destruct." He walked away, feeling more frustrated and disgusted than he had in a while. He had let his eleven year old sister get away from him, for force's sake.

A minute later, after Anakin had turned several corners, a hatch that seemed to blend into the floor and led into a nook for the right engine opened. Shadow peaked up; face streaked with grease, and looked around. She held the door open with the force and jumped out, still holding her mechanical arm limply beside her. She quietly slunk around the cruiser, slipping past all the clones and into the work shop. She knew it had all sorts of droid parts, and grabbed a servo-driver and a handful of basic parts and crawled under the work bench, opening up the panel on her arm and beginning.

A moment later, ashoka stepped inside, waiting. Shadow poked her head around, looking over.

Ashoka approached soundlessly and crawled under the bench beside her.

"You okay?" she asked quietly.

Shadow nodded, tightening a bolt somewhere in her arm.

"Anakin's pretty upset you got away from him." Ashoka said.

Shadow sighed. "Of course I got away, ashoka. He underestimated me. He _always _does! I wouldn't be in this big fight with him if he didn't!"

Ashoka nodded quietly, waiting for shadow to say more.

"Sorry for yelling.' Shadow said. "Is he still looking for me?"

Ashoka shook her head. 'Nope. But like I sat, he's ticked off."

Shadow nodded and adjusted a small flow meter for power in her arm. She grabbed a small power cell off the floor and snapped it into her arm, quickly hocking up the wires and fastening it into place.

She smiled. "I always did hate Everlast power cells. They're cheap. But they come with my model, and Anakin was going to have to custom order one, so it would take a while."

Shadow smiled as her arm seemed to stop sagging, and she flexed her fingers easily. She frowned and quietly adjusted anther circuit, making sure the power flow was at maximum. She grinned and quietly placed the metal part of her arm back in place, flexing it once again.

She sighed with relief. "Fixed it." She said happily. She stood and set her servo driver on the work bench, then turned to face ashoka.

"Ready to go onto the bridge?" Ashoka asked.

Shadow shook her head. "he's still fuming. I'll show up to dinner. You can go… act normal…."

Ashoka nodded and left.

Shadow sighed and flexed her mechanical arm. She was never going to put a cover on this awesome robot piece. She felt a pang for her flesh and bone arm, yes, but no synthetic cover was going to fix that.

She sighed and knew she'd have to lay low, choosing a broken Delta star fighter to hide under.

She grabbed a servo-driver and started working. She could always work. When her hands were busy, she didn't have to think. Thinking reminded her of everything wrong. Her brother not wanting her to become a padawan, the icy silence between them, his lack of faith, her burning determination, and always, the need to find some way to prove herself to him.

She knew Delta star fighters too well, along with every piece of machinery, though, so she could think while she worked. It was almost instinctive, really, fixing things.

By the time she was done, the fighter would power up.

Her comm signaled. "Dinner, padawan.' Obi-wan said.

Shadow nodded. 'coming." She said.

She slid out from under the star fighter, wiping her greasy hands on her tunic and heading towards the mess hall.

Protein cubes was for dinner. She hated them, but she didn't really care. After Geonoshia, any food was amazing to her.

Starving for two years had its advantages.

She slid easily into a seat beside ashoka with her tray and grinned.

"hi guys.' She said. She easily used her fingers to pop a protein cube into her mouth.

Anakin frowned. "Fork, Shadow." He said. Shadow knew he was really studying her robot arm, though, deducing if she had fixed it properly.

" replaced the power cell and adjusted the main flow meter.' Shadow said without looking up.

Anakin nodded his approval. Shadow flexed her metal fingers and sighed. "you know, one of these fingers should really be a fork, Anakin."

Ashoka laughed and Anakin rolled his eyes.

"It's meant for combat, shadow, not just eating."

"Well then, you should stop worrying about me in combat, since I'm all set." Shadow said. She grinned and popped another protein cube into her mouth with her hand. "You should really work on my table manners, bro.' she said, mouth full.

Anakin sighed, and Ashoka hid her grin, while Obi-wan looked slightly amused.

"Master, aren't you going to teach her or something?" Anakin asked, exasperated.

Obi-wan shook his head and grinned.

"Why not? You were never this lax with me, master!"

"Because I enjoy watching you struggle, Anakin." Obi-wan said, grinning.

Shadow smiled slightly and kept eating.

Anakin sighed and gave up.

Chapter

Abridon was a large, hilly planet, and it would have been like naboo, if the occupants had been friendlier and the attitude different. The landscape was beautiful, with hills, forests, valleys, and plains, even mountains rising in the distance, but the main center of the planet was an ugly, smoke belching city, filled with ship manufactures.

Ashoka shook her head in disgust as the landing ship neared the surface.

Ashoka turned away from her window and walked over to shadow, who stared down at the golden valley below in disbelief.

"It's beautiful." She whispered.

Ashoka nodded. "So, this is your first official mission." She reminded Shadow.

"Yeah.' Shadow said, grinning sheepishly. "help me look good, please?"

"You don't need me to.' Ashoka assured her.

Shadow nodded but still looked a little nervous.

The gunship landed easily, and the small force of troopers exited, along with Shadow, Anakin, Ashoka, and Obi-wan.

They strode out, survival packs in hand. They were on the outskirts of the city now, and Obi-wan consulted his data pad.

"three clicks north." He said, and started walking.

They trooped along in serious silence, wondering what lay ahead of them.

As they walked through the woods, they saw a valley ahead, that opened up into a fighting ground where a battalion of droids was stationed.

Anakin realized they had been expected.

There were craters along the ground, he realized some deep and inhabited by gundarks.

"Shadow, stay here." He ordered.

Shadow crossed her arms indignantly. "you're not my master.' She said.

Just then, the droids sensed them and began firing.

The clones flanked the Jedi as they fought fiercely, all taking down droids.

Anakin was surrounded by twenty droids, and Shadow summoned the force and jumped behind him, covering his back and deflecting fire.

"What are you doing!?" Anakin demanded, still fighting hard.

"Saving your skin!" she yelled over the blaster fire.

"take cover in a hole!" he ordered.

The droids around them were now demolished. "But, Anakin," she started. "I said, take cover!" Anakin yelled.

Shadow summoned the force and quickly jumped into a crater, straight into a gundark nest.

Shadow instantly sensed her mistake as she heard gundarks howling all around her. The sounds of battle were faint from above, and it was pitch black where she was, her light saber the only glow.

She closed her eyes and focused, using the force to guide her as she stood in a battle stance.

With a flash of fur and teeth, a gundark flew at her, howling fiercely.

Shadow ducked the blow and sliced the creature in half, and it died instantly. Another rushed her from the side- she summersaulted under it and stabbed it's chest.

One came from one side, and another rushed her while she was busy. She hurriedly dodge and swung her saber in a wide arch, decapitating them both.

They all rushed her from there, and she swung her light saber in a constant blur of motion, always wounding or killing her attackers.

At one point, when her focus slipped, she felt the razor sharp claws of a gundark slash across her face, and felt the warm blood dripping around her. She back flipped out of the gundarks encircling her and heard it. The cry of the charging gundarks. There was a legend saying that the cry of a gundark could freeze one's blood.

She froze up in pure terror at the sound and almost took a slash to the neck.

The sounds of battle outside were growing fainter, and she was sweating buckets as she fought off the remaining dozen or so gundarks. Finally, when half of them lay dead, and a quarter wounded, they retreated back into their nests.

Shadow sighed and reached for her cable launcher. She was alive, at least. But that wasn't saying much.

Anakin had watched in horror as his sister jumped into the gundark nest. For a moment, he had thought she wanted to go suicidal, until he realized she had no clue there was a gundark nest there.

He couldn't do anything for her now- he felt it weigh on his heart like physical strain as he fought furiously, downing droid after droid.

Finally, the clones blasted the rest of the droids. He had fought forward, away from where Shadow had jumped. He started to run towards the nest, light saber still ignited.

Obi-wan grabbed his wrist.

"Anakin!" he yelled.

"Shadow jumped into the gundark nest!" he yelled.

Obi-wan still held him back, and he turned angrily towards her master.

"What are you doing!? You're apprentice is down there!"

"Anakin, listen. Do you hear the silence? The fighting is over."

Anakin felt his heart sink. She hadn't made it.

"We should go get the body." He said, disengaging his light saber.

Just then, a cable launcher latched on to the outside of the crater,

And Shadow hauled herself over the edge, blood spattering across her face.

"Hi." She panted, dusting herself off and getting to her feet, and placing her cable launcher back into her belt.

"You're _alive?" _Anakin asked stupidly.

"No duh, Ani. Now, come on, we have separatists to fight."

She shouldered her pack and started forward.

"Wait!" Anakin ordered. Shadow stopped and turned toward him. "You're hurt. Let the medic take a look at that cut." Shadow rolled her eyes and sighed, sitting down while the medic hurried off and wiped the blood off her face, bandaging the slash across her cheek.

Ashoka hovered nearby, only just returning from the very edge of the battle field.

"What happened?" ashoka asked, sitting beside Shadow.

"Oh, Anakin told me to take cover in a crater, and then I ended up in a gundark nest."

"A _gundark nest!?_" Ashoka looked alarmed. "and you escaped with only a _cut?_" Shadow nodded and got to her feet, thanking the medic and shouldering her pack. 'Yep. Gundarks are really stupid."

Shadow fell into step beside Obi-wan and ashoka.

Obi-wan shot her a worried look. "You're sure you're well, padawan?" he asked. Shadow nodded. "Fine, master."

Anakin noted the eerie silence. It had been like this even since he voiced his opinion about Shadow not being padawan ready.

"See?" he said, and shadow turned to face him. "if you were ready to be a padawan, you would have known where the gundark nest was."

Ashoka snorted and shadow rolled her eyes. 'if you hadn't made me take cover in a hole, I never would have gone _into _the gundark nest."

"That's not the point, shadow." Anakin said. The point is, you got hurt."

Shadow rolled her eyes again. "Fine. I'll shove you into a gundark nest, and we'll see if you come out with a scratch."

Anakin sighed in exasperation, and was about to quickly retort when obi-wan interrupted him. "No more bickering, you two. We have a job, after all. Besides, I think Shadow's proved herself enough time."

Anakin sighed, and they kept walking.


	3. Chapter 3

They walked along in silence for awhile. Shadow between Obi-wan and Ashoka, Anakin next to Obi-wan, and the clone troopers behind them. Finally, they reached the outpost. Shadow stopped abruptly and looked up. "It's abandoned." She said.

"How would you know? There could still be droids there. They don't have a life force."

Shadow sighed. "Fine, waste your time looking for droids. But try the data terminals. I sense they're still intact."

Just then, her face fell. "Nope. Someone just deleted them."

"You mean they're still here?" Anakin asked.

Shadow sighed. "No. I only sense our own men and us. There are no droids. It was probably a remote delete from somewhere far away."

Obi-wan walked forward, Ashoka beside him, and they started searching. They found nothing useful.

Dusk was falling over the planet now.

"Let's set up camp." Anakin said. "I'll scout out the rest of the place, looking from droids."

Shadow said. Anakin was about to protest when Shadow started off, survival pack already shouldered.

Anakin sighed and started the fire, but he kept his bond with his sister open, checking every minute to be sure nothing had happened.

Soon, they were settled and eating. Anakin closed his eyes and focused, cross-legged.

_Shadow was moving almost soundlessly through the forest, stepping carefully, focus spread all around her. Her face was throbbing, from the gundark cut, he realized. She staggered and fell, cursing in huttenese. She stood and took a deep breath, regaining her focus and-_

just like that, the bond was gone. He couldn't sense her anymore.

"Obi-wan!" he stared at his master.

"Yes?" Obi-wan looked surprised. "Master, I can't sense Shadow anymore. It's like she just- disappeared."

Obi-wan shook his head. "U can sense her clearly Anakin. She must have realized you were spying on her and shut you out. I'm surprised she hasn't done it already, with how unsupportive you've been."

"Unsupportive!?" Anakin was offended.

"I just don't want an eleven-year old being shipped out into the clone wars."

"No." Ashoka corrected him. "You don't want _you're _eleven year old being shipped out into the Clone wars. Besides, Shadow was basically a padawan already. She survived a spice trade when she was six, escaped slavery and destroyed the second factory on Geonosis, led the squadron through the third factory, managed to drag us both Out of the wreckage, survived a duel against Dooku- I mean, even _I _haven't done that, Skyguy."

Anakin shook his head. "You don't know her like I do." he said.

Ashoka raised an eye marking. "Oh really? I'm just not as overprotective as you."

"Never mind." Anakin muttered, and looked down at the fire.

Some clones were already asleep, others preparing to bed down for the night. IT had been two hours, Anakin realized, and Shadow still wasn't back.

"Obi-wan, can you sense her at all? Is she okay?" he asked.

Obi-wan shook his head. "I can't tell right now, Anakin. She's occupied, doing something."

Anakin sighed.

Shadow perched on the forked branch of a high tree, about forty feet up. She had sensed the clankers awhile ago, and allowed the force to guide her. She felt strange, hollow, and she remembered she had closed off her force-bond with Anakin. She suddenly felt alone, exposed, even.

She was probably the only padawan in the Jedi order with two bonds. One to Obi-wan, the other to Anakin. But both could sense her like she was their own padawan. Of course, Mace and the council knew this, but wouldn't address it.

Now she was bonded with only one being, Obi-wan. It felt strange. Obi-wan was as close to her, if not closer, than Anakin, but she wasn't sure she could predict his actions as she could with Anakin.

She shook her head to clear it and took out her macro binoculars.

She homed in on where the force had guided her.

There. A few hundred yards out, sat a small troop of guarding droids. Up ahead was a mountain, and she realized it. The base _was _the mountain.

A noisy bird alighted beside her- not even a foot from her, she realized, and startled her. She nearly lost her footing as she looked over at it. It cocked her head at her. "_Who?_" it asked.

It's eyes glowed yellow in the night.

"Owl." She whispered to herself. She had read about owls. They came from another galaxy, but some had been brought here.

The bird made a terrible hacking noise, and spit a pellet of fuzz off to the right.

Shadow grinned. "Cool." she whispered.

She sensed it was late, and she was tired- she had to return to camp now, or Anakin would be worried. Eight more clicks of walking.

She sighed and jumped down from her perch, using the force to land soundlessly. She settled her pack on her shoulders and started walking.

She heard the flapping of wings behind her, and the call of the owl as it alighted on a branch in front of her. It cocked it's head, bright eyes still glowing.

"_Who?_" it asked again.

"Shadow." she whispered to it, then walked off, back towards camp.

Anakin was on the verge of going to find Shadow himself when he heard a branch crack and Shadow strode into camp.

"Found the real outpost." she said, tossing him her data pad.

"Nine clicks out. In the mountain." Anakin studied the details she had gathered.

"You walked eighteen clicks?" he asked, looking at her.

Shadow nodded, preoccupied with dragging her thermal cape out of her survival pack.

Anakin noticed several new scratches on her face, as well dirt on the claw mark from the gundark.

"You're hurt." he said, more concerned than he was tired.

"I'm fine." Shadow shook her head at him and laid down.

A moment later, she felt cool hands smearing bacta over her face.

"Hey!" she tried to push Anakin away.

"Look, I don't care if you blocked out the bond, or if you think you're a padawan. You're my sister, you're hurt, and I'm going to help you."

Shadow sighed, too tired to resist, and allowed Anakin to clean her wounds with the bacta, settlings down on the ground.

She had drifted off to sleep by the time Anakin knew she would roll over in the dirt and get her cut dirty again.

He sighed and placed her head in his lap, making sure it wouldn't disturb her cheek.

The last thing he wanted was for the wound to fester.

As had was drifting off, he felt something calming wash over him. He looked down at his sister, who still lay in his lay, and realized it. She had reopened the bond.

The morning came all too quickly for Anakin. He awoke to find Shadow no longer sprawled on his lap, but clinging to him, head settled against his chest. Bacta was smeared all over his cloak. He sighed but smiled, gently moving so as not to disturb Shadow to get his survival pack.

He opened it and grabbed some food capsules, quickly eating breakfast.

Shadow soon awoke and rolled off his lap, rummaging around in her own pack and demolishing a protein bar.

Obi-wan took one look at Shadow sitting beside Anakin eating and the bacta smeared across his cloak and Shadow's ace and raised an eyebrow.

Anakin shrugged, trying to hide his smile.

The bond was open, and would remain ope, he realized.

Just the, Brick, a clone who had died in battle the other day, strode into camp.

"General?" he asked.

Anakin got to his feet, surprised.

"Brick!" Shadow flew forward and hugged him, happy he was alive.

"Woah." Brick pulled away, looking at Shadow's bacta smeared face.

"What happened to you?"

Shadow shrugged. "I jumped into a gundark nest."

Brick looked at Anakin, clearly confused.

"I'll explain later, Brick. But, How are you alive?"

Obi-wan and a medic were already checking the trooper over for injuries.

Brick shrugged. "I was knocked unconscious in the explosion, sir. I woke up and tracked you to camp."

Anakin nodded, still studying his trooper.

"Good to have you back,. Brick." he said finally. "Are you fit for duty?"

The medic nodded. "Perfectly fine, sir." he said evenly. "A miracle."

Shadow grinned as she strode beside Brick.

Shadow had taken a specific liking to Brick, since he had taught her how to shoot his pistol on Geonosis.

Anakin drew out the plans in the dirt.

"From what Shadow's told us, the base is located in the mountain." he said.

"We've received information from the temple, and they's supposedly a series of underground tunnels which they use for transport down there."

"So we're using the tunnels?" Ashoka looked surprised.

Anakin grinned. "Nope, they';d be expecting that."

"So, we have to climb the mountain like idiots and be exposed?" Ashoka asked.

Anakin again shook his head. "Nope. I've decided to be even more _creative_."

Ashoka rolled her eyes. "I don't like where this is going." She said.

Anakin looked amused. "Yes, you wouldn't. We're going to attack in the open like complete idiots, while Obi-wan and Ashoka invade the tunnels."

Shadow cocked her head. "You're actually letting me be in battle?" she asked.

Anakin nodded. "But only because you're with me."

Shadow sighed. "Fine. Baby steps, I guess."

Anakin grinned and nodded to the troops.

"First, we set them off by detonating things near the exit. They'll retaliate, and hopefully, the distraction will work. Then, Ashoka and Obi-wan will infiltrate the tunnels, and, hopefully, blow up the power station."

Ashoka nodded. Anakin handed her and Obi-wan a pack of detonators.

"Any questions?" he asked.

No one had any questions. "Alright then, let's move out." he ordered. They started to walk.

It was still near down, and an owl kept fluttering by.

It always seemed to hover around Shadow, swooping and diving to hover near her for a moment, and then disappear into the trees.

"Shadow, next time that owl comes by, kill it." Anakin ordered.

Shadow sighed. "I met it last night, Anakin."

Anakin shook his head. "Fine. Whatever. Let it try to kill you. I don't care. You make the decisions, after all. _Padawan._"

He could tell his last words cut deep, since Shadow's eyes began to burn with rage. Her cheeks flushed, and she looked at the ground.

The owl fluttered again beside her, and she let ut a whisper.

"_Shadow..._" it could have been just a breath of wind, but he owl had landed on her shoulder the next moment, and it rotated it's neck around, glowing yellow eyes burning almost hatefully at Anakin.

The owl obstructed her face from view, and so he didn't see the one tear run down her cheek.

Ashoka felt the urge to go and stand by Shadow, but knew her master wouldn't allow it. She had to split with the ground in a few minutes, anyways. And Shadow had her owl.

Brick fell behind and need up in step with Shadow. He was the only one who had seen the single tear.

"Don't listen to him, commander." he whispered. It was so quiet, again, it could have been a breath of wind, but Shadow knew it was real. She let a small smile cross her lips, and the owl's wings fluttered, brushing the tear off her face.

She fingered her light saber, so ready, willing to prove herself. She _was _a padawan.

Ashoka and Obi-wan started down the muddy path towards the tunnels of the mountain.

The silence was eerie, almost. Shadow was always the one to crack jokes, but instead she just absent-mindedly stroked her owl, and it nestled against her cheek.

Finally, Anakin spoke.

"Shadow, kill that thing. It's probably diseased. It'll go nuts any time now."

Shadow whirled, and the owl flapped it's wings in protest.

"Shut up, Skywalker. I don't take orders from you anymore. After all, younglings don't have masters."

Shadow smiled with mock sweetness, and the bitter hatred in her eyes betrayed her.

Anakin recoiled, slightly shocked at what he had seen. Shadow turned again to face forward, then whistled, and her owl responded softly. "_Who?"_

Anakin knew his outburst before had hurt his sister, but she had _never _spoken to him like that before.

Shadow, we're going into combat. You _will _listen to me. Is that clear?"

Shadow flashed him another hateful look. She spoke rapidly in geonoshian.

"_What _did you say to me young lady?" Anakin was stunned. He recognized curse words in her speech, and was shocked even more by the satisfied look on her face.

"Better go look it up, _Padawan_." Shadow said.

Anakin turned around and clenched and unclenched his fists. He would let it go. He had to let it go. If he exploded, he didn't know what Shadow would do. Run into the line fo fire? Run away? Try to kill him? Cry?

They had reached the battle sight now, and two clones approached with thermal detonators.

They aimed carefully, and the walls of the mountain exploded, crumbling into dust.

Just then, the walls exploded from the inside, clearing an entry way. Anakin heard the thunder of hundreds of metal feet, and the dust settled. At least six hundred droids were marching towards them.

"Positions!" Anakin yelled over the thunder of thousands of tons of metal marching towards them. "Take cover while you shoot!"

He looked over to see where Shadow was, btu found she was already ahead, gathering the force to leap into the middle of the droids, planting both feet on one and pushing off, tipping it over and slicing at least half a dozen down as she went.

_Great. _Anakin thought quietly, as he rushed forward, trying to catch up to her. But she was too fast, fighting brilliantly with quick, even strokes, blocking fire as well as demolishing droids.

At least a forth of the droids escaped her, and the clones moved forward to defeat those behind her.

Shadow otherwise continued moving, a small blur among the droids.

The heat from the balsters was unbearable, the dust kicked up by the explosions choking and stinging.

They were going to wear down soon, he knew.

At least two hundred droids littered the ground when shadow changed her tactic.

She used the force, closing her eyes and still deflecting balsters bolts, and turned around the fired row of droids, allowing them to on fire on there comrades.

Then, when around two hundred droids remained, the real struggle began.

Shadow was exhausted, as well as he was, he knew, and the droids were circling in around Anakin.

Shadow saw that at least fifty of the droids were around her brother, and force jumped to help him. From there, they fought back to back, deflecting fire and slicing through the droids easily. But for every droid they demolished, there were another three in it's place, and the circle they were trapped in was getting smaller and smaller...

Shadow sensed rather than saw the thermal detonator hit the ground beside Anakin and her. He was too preoccupied to see it, and she used the force to shove him away as it exploded, sending her flying...

Anakin felt the force poohing him forward, and he realized it was Shadow. For a secant, he thought she was trying to push him into the line of fire, but then a thermal detonator exploded, blowing him off his feet.

He sensed, rather than saw her body go flying. He had no idea where she had landed.

"Shadow!" he screamed her name. The smoke around him was thick and choking, and he sliced through droid after droid, trying in vain to find her.

Finally, there were no droids left, only rubble on the ground.

The medics worked among the wounded clones, and, wordlessly, Anakin rushed among the wreckage, searching for the small girl, anything, that would help him.

He found her training light saber on the ground, marks in the dust were her arms had been splayed carelessly, as though she were limp.

Blood dotted the dirt around where she had landed, and he found hr comlink sparking a few feet away.

He strode back into camp, not sensing anything. The wounded had been treated, the dead counted, and everyone sat waiting for his orders.

Anakin just shook his head and sat down, placing his head in his hands. "Wait for Obi-wan, and hope Shadow's still alive."

Ashoka rushed out of the tunnel along with Master Kenobi. Obi-wan seemed tense, almost afraid. They had blown up the power core. The station was now useless. But all the workers and files had, again, been evacuated. They're had to be another base, somewhere.

Obi-wan found hundred of droid parts littering the battle field, and a small encampment of clones around the treeline. He sprinted there, and Ashoka could hardly keep pace.

Anakin!" Obi-wan's voice was laced with panic. "Where's Shadow?"

Anakin lifted his head and stared mournfully at Obi-wan. Sweat and grime covered his cheeks, and Ashoka noticed the training light saber hanging next to his own. Quietly, he handed it to Obi-wan. "I don't know." he mumbled.


	4. Chapter 4

Shadow moaned. She had fallen somewhere, seemed like she kept falling, and she at recalled feeling her skin burn, hitting the ground hard, everything spinning, and pain.

She had been gathered up in cold, metallic arms. She was struggling not to black out, let alone fight. She was thrown onto a speeder, stun cuffs slapped onto her wrists, a force collar around her neck. The speeder revved away from the battle ground. She was too weak to even call to Anakin for help. She blacked out.

Now, she was lying on a cold floor, gundark cut underneath her. She got up, feeling something sticky all around her. Blood. She was lying in a pool of blood. That wasn't good. She wanted to close her eyes and lay down again. Wanted to gather the force around her and use it to call Anakin, heal herself. But the collar wouldn't let her, and she felt the gaping absence, the hollowness inside her. And suddenly, she realized it. Without the force, she was helpless.

She gasped and sat it, flashes of color and pain making her double over.

She looked down. Her leg was sliced deeply across the calf. She sighed and tried to wrap the wound in a rag. Her arm had a gorge in it, probably from where she had landed. And her good arm ached like heck. It was burned, she saw.

She tried to stagger to her feet and fell back down, feeling nausea rush into her throat. She vomited bile and blood onto the floor beside her. She moaned, and rolled away from it. She _would _get out of here. She _was _a padawan. And she was going to black out again.

She let unconsciousness wash over her again.  
**********************

"What do you mean you don't know!?" obi-wan asked, and Obi-wan unease was becoming evident.

"I don't know." Anakin said again. 'she pushed me away from a thermal detonator, and she was gone! She probably left me on her own. Force, I hope she just ran away because she hates me. I'd do anything to have her back."

"She _hates _you?" obi-wan gaped. Anakin nodded. "You didn't hear. I told her to kill the owl, she said no, and I mocked her out, called her a padawan like she was a youngling. You should have seen her, Obi-wan. She was so upset. She said she didn't take orders from me anymore. Said younglings don't have masters. Cussed me out in Geonoshian. Force, I'm the worst brother ever!"

Anakin was silent after this, staring at his boots.

"yes, Anakin." Obi-wan said hotly. "Yes, you just might be." Obi-wan left.

Ashoka didn't know what to do. She couldn't believe what Anakin had said to shadow, and she was mad. But she was also sorry, so sorry for him, that he was living the way he was, feeling so awful.

She sat beside him, silent. She was just there. That was all he needed. "they must have another outpost, master." She assured him.

"Yes, but how do we find it? It seems so impossible, Snips."

Ashoka looked at him like he was crazy. "Are you stupid?! You're a skywalker, Master!

Anakin shook his head. "I don't know what that even means anymore."

Shadow woke up to find her force collar was gone. She gathered the force around her instantly, feeling it course through her veins, focusing and healing herself. Soon, he gashes were all scabbed over nicely, and she felt somewhat better. She could stagger to her feet, at least.

She heard footsteps, heavy ones, coming towards her. She decided to play dumb, and hurriedly laid down, closing her eyes and curling up like a wounded child. She smiled, realizing her stun cuffs were gone, too.

The force field to her room deactivated.

Two men she had seen _way _too much entered. Nute Gunray was one of them, and the other- was someone else she had no clue. Her mind was still fuzzy. But she definitely wasn't happy to be here.

Nute looked down, clearly disapproving. "Dooku said to cuff and collar her. Look at the twig! She's like a flea!"

"The republic sends children into war, and yet they say _we _are evil!" Gunray remarked.

Shadow moaned, still not feeling entirely right, and trying to pull off her act. Nute knelt beside her and used his slimy finger to raise her chin. She pretended to blink blearily, and looked into the ugly face of Nute.

"Count Dooku will be pleased." Her chin fell back to the ground, and they left.

Shadow was stunned. She felt terror and nausea wash over her again, and broke into a cold sweat at the memory of Dooku.

The force was with her now, the realized. Better to take advantage of it now than to have Nute collar her again.

She breathed in the force and focused.

_I'm alright, Ani._

Anakin's head jerked upright when he heard the message.

He hurried to gather the force around him to respond.

_Shadow! I'm so, so sorry! I'm the worst brother in the world, I know. Are you alright? I sense you're dizzy. Where are you?_

There was silence for a moment.

Then, _I'm not sure. Nute Gunray just paid me a visit. They're going to ship me out to Dooku. Can't take anymore- I have to do something. Bye, Ani._

Then she was gone. "Obi-wan!" Anakin ran uo to where Obi-wan was walking, and his old master turned to face him.

"She's alright. She re-opened the bond, master."

Obi-wan raised an eyebrow. "Why didn't she talk to me?" he asked.

Anakin shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I was easier to reach or something. But the point is, she's alright. For now, anyways. She says Nute gunray is going to ship her out to Dooku."

Shadow crouched by the door and waited. Soon a droid deactivated the shield and entered with a tray of gunk he called food. Hurriedly, Shadow rushed out and put the force-field back in place, trapping the droid in her cell.

She cast the force around her like a net, feeling everything. There were no other prisoners here. Only her. She didn't have much time.

She whirled, feeling like she was a puppet, letting the strings of the force guide her every limb.

She raced around the edge of the hall and into a turbo lift, punching in a floor level on a hunch.

She entered into a durasteel hallway. It was deserted.

There was a locked room ahead of her, and instead of trying to open the doors, she crawled into a vent, replacing the grate after her. She crawled out in a room filled with weapons. Flame throwers, blaster rifles, jetpacks, thermal detonators- she was amazed at the vast supply of things here.

But she knew what she needed, and ran over to a crate of thermal detonators, hiding one in each boot, and the rest in the concealed pockets inside her tunic. She also placed two in her regular pockets, and knew she'd need to distract people, make them think she had all the weapons she needed. She ran up to the wall and grabbed a flame thrower, as well a a small pistol. She could hardly lift the flamethrower, it was that heavy. She staggered towards the doors, when they skid open. Nute gunray and his companion entered.

They both stopped dead, and shadow struggled to raise the flame thrower, shooting licks of flame at them. The weapon had a kick back like a heavy rifle, and she could barely manage to hold onto it. Nute and his companion hit the ground.

Then the blaster fire started, and she dropped to the ground in surrender, knowing that she couldn't escape with a blaster wound.

Nute and his companion strode forward triumphantly, the unnamed companion searching her. He found the two detonators in her regular pockets and the pistol.

He smirked, and Gunray laughed. "Next time, choose a weapon you can carry, Jedi!"

She heard a clanging noise behind her and winced as something that was hard metal hit in the shoulder, and she dropped to her knees. Another strike from above, and she was unconscious.

Anakin felt her presence in the force weaken and froze. Was she dying? Being tortured, maybe?

He sighed in frustration and started to assign scouting parties to look for the next base. They would find it, and storm it, and he would free her. He knew they would.

Dusk was approaching, and Obi-wan elected Anakin stay with ashoka and guard camp. He knew how much it pained Anakin, but he knew Anakin needed time to reflect on what he had said and done to his sister.

Anakin already understood, and he stared into the fire.

_Shadow, are you there?_

No response. Anakin felt fear well up within him, and he let the obvious torment him. It was _his _fault.

Shadow felt worse than she had before. Burns, cuts, bruises, she had more now, she sensed time was running shot. She didn't have time to heal herself. She staggered to her feet and was once again overwhelmed by nausea. She gagged, but swallowed the bile, and moved forward.

She was chained to the wall, she realized, and the chains seemed to restrain her from using the force. She sighed, the chains were fairly long, and locked. She gently opened a small panel built into her metallic arm and grinned, finding her multi-tool safely hidden there.

She flipped open the small knife blade and went to work.

She had picked locks before, and now was no different. Soon, the chains around her were nothing but scrap on the floor.

She felt in her concealed pocked and boots. The detonators were still there. She grinned, flexing her hands. She could use the force, now that she was free from her chains.

A magnaguard was stationed outside her cell with an electrostaff, and gathered the force to move a chair in the distance, knocking it over. The droid's sensors picked up the movement, and it strode over to investigate. Shadow used the force to slam a paper weight into the control panel, deactivating the force field. The magnaguard stood to face her, electro staff ready. She had no idea where her light saber was. She sighed, and used the force to shove the magnaguard into her cell, locking it as she went.

The force hummed strongly around her, like a presence. She knew she needed to get to the main reactor that powered the entire base, and that once she destroyed that, it would be alright.

But she also knew that once she destroyed the reactor, it would probably destroy her.

The reactor was on the main level, surrounded by droids. Shadow dove into alcoves and pressed her back against the wall, narrowly escaping patrols.

She sprinted along, once again, guided by the force.

The main reactor room was unguarded.

She placed her three thermal detonators on the core and activated them all. Twenty seconds. Twenty seconds to run for her life.

She called on the force as she sprinted, skittering down a corner and into another hallway, not caring if she was noticed by droids. The explosion was deafening.

Metal flew into metal; sparks, flame, and smoke were everywhere, making the chaos intoxicating. She felt the force of it all slam her back, her head hitting the wall painfully. She couldn't think straight. Everything was blurred. She heard the sound of screeching metal and gathered the force around herself, forcing herself to remain alert and coherent.

The outpost was collapsing in on itself, she realized.

And she still had no clue how to get out.

The force again almost dragged her around, as she jumped over wrecked walls, tangled messes, heard frantic droids giving orders, and ran. She finally reached the top of the hanger, where Nute and his companion were just taking off. They saw her, and the pilot shot down towards her. Laser cannon fire pinged by her head, and the factory shifted sickeningly under her feet. Ten levels below was the ground. She gathered the force around her and jumped.

To any being as stupid as Nute gunray, it would look like suicide. To any being in her condition, it was nearly impossible to survive.

She gathered the force, and time slowed down, as did her fall.

She waited until she kept herself hovering a foot above the ground, at a complete stop. She gasped, then let herself hit the ground.

Nute's ship was already breaking the atmosphere. Another sickening explosion sounded form within the base, and she started to run.

In the night, she could see the fireball of the separatist outpost burning brightly. Her strength and alertness were slipping, she realized, and she sensed Anakin's location. That was it. The force guided her like the North Star, and she staggered towards him.

She had long since escaped the valley, and she now stumbled through the dense woods, towards wherever the force was taking her.

She was almost incoherent on her feet now, not registering things around her, only staggering on through the brush.

She staggered and fell at least three times, getting up dirty and mud-covered.

She found herself in something cold, almost wrapped around her, and so cold… it was rushing, she realized….

It was a river! She was so cold and exhausted she wanted to just close her eyes and let it sweep her away, and everything would be gone. She was shaking, and she had long since lost feeling in her hands. She tried to tread water, but could hardly do it. She doggy-paddled to the side of the river, the other side, and grabbed a root of a tree.

She hauled herself onto the banks with it, gaping, thankful to be alive. If she could just lay and sleep….

The force was the demon now, driving her on. It insisted she was awake and continued, when everything inside her screamed to stop.

She was getting closer. Everything nagged at her to stop, but the force seemed to drag her on, and she continued, the thorny branches raking her face and hair as she went.

She was gasping for breath now, every muscle burning. Then, with some amount of delusional pleasure, she realized she couldn't feel anymore. The pan was numbing. She was slipping away.

From the distance, a night bird flapped its wings and dove down. She stumbled and fell face-first into the dirt. She relaxed, grabbing a fist full of it, and finally gave up.

The bird perched next to her on the ground, and she looked into it's glowing yellow eyes.

It cocked it's head. _"Who?" _it asked.

"Shadow." She rasped. She staggered back to her feet. She was close now. She was sure of it.

The owl flew on ahead, and she dragged herself behind it, stumbling along through the woods, finally, she sensed it. She was alive. She had reached it.

Anakin had heard the explosion and felt every hope he had dimming. He sat down and waited by the fire, knowing there was nothing else he could do. Obi-wan's eyes were down-cast. Ashoka's face was pale. The clones were silent.

Hours ticked by. No one seemed to sleep. The fire died, and Obi-wan threw in more twigs.

Just then, she staggered into camp.

"Ani?" she asked hoarsely.

Anakin hurriedly stood and steadied shadow, who was swaying.

He gathered her into his arms and gently sat down, motioning the medics forward.

"shadow?" he asked. Her eyes were closed. He shook her slightly. "Shadow! Wake up! Talk to me!"

Shadow moaned. "Tired." Was all she said.

"Shadow, don't do this to me!" Anakin said. His sister was sopping wet in his arms, and she shook violently. She looked like she had been in a war zone.

"you have a concussion, alright?" Shadow opened her eyes quietly to look at him. "Don't sleep just yet."

Shadow pulled away fiercely and pushed away from Anakin. She vomited blood onto the dirt, and crawled back over to him.

They were all too busy tending to Shadow they didn't notice as brick slipped out of camp.

The holo-projector activated, showing count Dooku. "Master, she's returned. The outpost was destroyed." Dooku's face contorted with anger. "Nute will pay for that. Kill the girl, and the rest of them, if you can."

"yes, sir.' The transmission quickly ended.

Brick calmly strode back into camp, as if nothing had happened.

Anakin cradled his sister in his arms. He had lost hope so long ago, been so afraid. But she lay like the child she really was in his arms, wrapped in his thermal cloak, sleeping peacefully.

The medics had determined she had a concussion, several broken ribs, and it looked like she had been caught in an explosion of some sort. But the bruises would heal.

Anakin looked down at her as he stroked hair. The normally brown locks glowed golden the light of the fire, and for the fire time ever, he saw something he hadn't seen before cradled in his arms.

"Padawan."

"What?" shadow looked up, surprised at him.

"Hello, padawan Skywalker." He said, grinning like an idiot.

"hi." Shadow murmured. She curled up against his chest, still shaking slightly.

"I didn't think you'd made it." He said quietly.

Shadow smiled, half-way between sleep and waking. "I always make it, Ani. I'm a Skywalker…."

She trailed off as sleep overtook her, and for the first time in a while, Anakin felt something. Peace. He didn't realize how much his fight with shadow had been bothering him, but now that it was over, all he felt was peace.

He lay down by the fire, his arms still wrapped around his sister.

Ashoka curled up beside him, and he shifted his weight so that Ashoka could wriggle into the heap, too.

Shadow smiled in her sleep, sensing Ashoka was near, and wrapped her arms around her, holding tightly to her togurta friend.

Anakin sighed. Worry was exhausting. He closed his eyes and let sleep overtake him.

The overseeing to the building of a republic base seemed easy compared to the rest of the mission. The frame was already up within two hours, and the rest was easily being constructed. Then it was just a matter of stationing clones, and they could leave.

Shadow slept late. She never did like rising early, and after yesterday, he knew rest would be the best thing for her.

He left her with Brick while he went to survey progress on the base.

Shadow sighed and rolled over. It felt so nice to be by Anakin again. She could sense him, easily, and knew he was close by. He never went far from her when she was hurt.

Ashoka and rex were probably out with the rest of the troopers, doing battle drills.

Shadow sighed again and let her eyes close. They snapped open when she sensed danger, and rolled to the side.

She heard footsteps coming towards her, like in the movie Ashoka and her had watched. Where in the end, almost everyone died.

She whirled to face whoever it was, to find only Brick.

She sighed in relief. "Hey, brick. You scared me there for a minute."

Brick said nothing.

He took a step forward. The sunlight fell on something in bricks hand, and Shadow saw it glinting. Uneasy rose within her. She stepped back.

"Ummm… Brick? What are you doing?"

Brick took another step forward, and she saw clearly he was holding a knife in his hand. "I'm sorry commander.' He said, raising the knife. "but I have my orders."

Shadow felt the terror threaten to choke her. "Orders? Who ordered you to kill me?" she sounded surprisingly calm, she realized.

Suddenly, she knew. "Dooku. Brick, you were better than that! How could you let him get to you!?"

"I know where my allegiances lie, commander. You were raised by the Jedi, and I wish they hadn't poisoned you with their ways. But they have and so I have orders."

Shadow backed off, gathering the force around her. _Anakin! _She mentally screamed. _Help!_

Anakin visibly recoiled and sprinted away from where he was receiving his report, and Obi-wan looked after him, shocked.

"Is the commander alright, sir?" Cody asked awkwardly.

Obi-wan shook his head. "Get your blaster, Cody. Something's wrong."

Anakin fought through the brush, igniting his light saber as he went.

"You won't kill me, Brick.' Anakin used the force to enhance his hearing.

He heard a scoff. "Who's' going to save you? You're brother? You think he loves you?"

"He does love me!" Shadow yelled, voice rising. Anakin wanted to call out to her, but was devoting every ounce of energy to getting to her.

Her voice dipped back down to a normal volume. "He taught me well enough to fight you, after all."

Anakin heard a grunt and broke through the tree line, towards the clearing where camp was. He came to the deep river suddenly separating him from his sister.

_No…. _he thought desperately.

Brick advanced on Shadow, knife raised. Shadow didn't have a light saber, only the force, but he felt it gather around her….

Shadow dodged the stab and kicked Brick from behind, sending him sprawling.

"don't do this, Brick. Stand down." She said, still not losing her composure.

Anakin heard Obi-wan and Commander Cody rush up behind him. It was at least a twenty feet down to the river. It would be suicide in the current.

Brick bared down on Shadow, knife flying towards her neck. Shadow rolled easily under him and waited, till ready to fight.

Brick let out a stream of curses. Anakin was suddenly on his comlink. "rex! Get back to camp, now! Brick's trying to kill Shadow!"

He didn't get a response, but he sensed the clone captain was coming. But he was several minutes away. And they were helpless.

Anakin wished they could reach the bridge, but it was a click off, and he didn't think he could leave shadow for that long.

"My brother is here, brick. You won't win." Shadow said calmly.

"Uhhh!" brick cried out in effort as he tried a jagged slash across Shadow's face. Shadow reached up and grabbed his arm, the blade centimeters from her flesh. She looked into Brick's eyes. Brick strained to bring the knife down on her, but she held him. "Why, Brick? Why?"

Brick lashed out with his one hand, knocking Shadow off her feet.

Shadow was on the ground, near the edge of the cliff, on her back. Brick bared down, ready to strike the fatal blow. Shadow grabbed his arm, and he still strained to stab her.

In the distance, rex and ashoka were approaching.

Shadow knew she could flip brick easily over the edge, to his death in the water. But she kicked him in the chest with both feet, and he staggered back, giving her a chance to regain her feet.

She couldn't use Jedi mind tricks yet, but she wished she could give Brick a sleep suggestion. She wasn't powerful enough, though, and Brick swung the knife haphazardly, grazing under her eye. The blood ran down her cheek like tears, and still she fought, easily dodging and flipping over blades.

Finally, shadow had him backed up against the edge of the cliff. The clone troops had arrived, and an entire squadron was assembled, guns all trained on Brick.

"Come back, brick." Shadow said quietly. The wind whipped her hair back. "You're still good. You'll come back. I know you will. Please, don't go to the dark side."

Brick shook his head hurriedly. "He'll kill me, either way, now…." His voice was shaking.

"He knows I've failed, he'll send someone for me…."

"We will protect you."

"You aren't strong enough!" brick yelled.

"You have the Jedi order!" Shadow retorted.

Brick shook his head. "No." he said finally. "No, I'll die either way." He turned and jumped off the cliff, down into the icy waters below, to his death.

"_Brick!_" Shadow screamed his name long after he was gone, swept out of sight by the river. She fell to her knees at the cliff's edge, head in her hands, shaking.

Anakin watched her cry over the man who had tried to kill her, and he was amazed.

Chapter

The cruiser was eerily quiet. Alone in the cargo bay sat one figure, on a crate crammed into the small space, crying her eyes out.

It wasn't the pain- she ahd long since gotten used to the stabbing pain in her head and ribs, and the dull burning from her numerous cuts and scares. It was grief. Brick, he long time commander and friend, was gone.

Someone sat silently down beside her, crouching to fit in the small hold.

Anakin.

She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face, and sniffed. "you were so right, Ani. I wasn't ready."

More silent tears fell as she waited for him to say I told you so.

Instead, she felt a strong hand on her back.

"Shadow, what you did on the mission was remarkable. Surviving, sacrificing yourself numerous times, Shadow, you're a hero."

Shadow shook her head, despite the pain it caused her. "I'm a murder. I'm the reason Brick's gone, Ani. I should have done something, stopped him, talked to him more- something. I should have seen him going to the dark side."

Anakin shook his head and pulled her close, and she cried into his tunic.

Finally, he gently pulled her away from him and tilted her chin up. "look at me." He ordered quietly. Shadow sniffed, still shaking, and looked at him with watery eyes.

"You did everything you could, no one, not even the knights, saw him going to the dark side. It was his own choice, shadow. You tried your best to save him, even when you risked yourself. I honestly would have killed him. And then, you showed remorse at his death. Its more than I ever could have done, Shady."

Shadow shook her head. "yeah, well I'm still stupid. I screwed up on everything- the gundark nest, getting captured, not staying awake, cussing you out. I'm so sorry, Ani."

She wrapped her arms around him again and cried.

"Shhh…shhh…. Let it all out.' He said quietly.

Finally, when she was quiet again, he spoke.

"Shadow, I was awful to you. You had every right to be angry at me. You made a mistake or two, but it was your first mission. And you did so much, destroyed the base, saved my life, put Nute on the run- and I'm sorry."

Shadow just sniffed and snuggled against him.

"Do you know what I'm sorry for?" he asked.

Shadow shook her head quietly.

'I'm sorry I was such a jerk, but even more, I'm sorry that I let my emotions cloud my judgment. I'm sorry I didn't let myself see what a great padawan you have become." Shadow smiled quietly and cried even more, but this time, she was crying tears of joy.

Shadow was completely exhausted, that much was clear. As she drifted off to sleep, Anakin stroked her hair and talked to her.

"The war is bad, Shadow. You'll be with obi-wan more often, I'm sure of it. You might not see me for a while. But know this- I'll always be with you."

Shadow nodded, and mumbled something. "I love you." She whispered.

"I love you too, Shady." He whispered, looking at her bandaged face. "More than you will ever know."


End file.
